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onsdag den 8. januar 2014

"Punk rock from Down Under, 1978 style. For decibel junkies only."


Essensen af Dave Marsh anmeldelse af The Saints debutplade ’(I'm) Stranded’ fra 1977 i Rolling Stones Record Guide, 1979. Eller hvad med disse ord af Michael Bloom fra selvsamme blad om Suicides debut fra 1977:

"I've heard stolen riffs before, but this is far worse: rapine and pillage of entire concepts...Suicide's songs are absolutely puerile, and Alan Vega's vocal convey nothing but arrogance and wholesale insensibility...persistence doesn't legitimize this kind of idiocy."

En bruger på Rate Your Music har affattet en liste, der kort og kontant hedder ’Rolling Stone's 500 Worst Reviews of All Time (work in progress)’. Det er morsomt læsestof.

Om Roxy Musics ‘For Your Pleasure’, skrev Paul Gambaccinii i 1973:

"...remarkably inaccessible...Side two drones on with a nine-minute instrumental that sounds like a rip-off of the Doors' "Alabama Song." The title tune ends the album, but is it a tune? It sounds like dogs barking repetitively for minutes on end. Maybe it is Eno's genius at work, but if so you've gotta be Mensa level to understand him or be so stoned you still think the drum solo on "In-a-Gadda-da-Vida" is a tour de force."

Denne plamage af Ken Emerson handler om Syd Barretts debutplade ’The Madcap Laughs’ fra 1970:

"Fans of Floyd should be warned that The Madcap Laughs/Barrett may not be their cup of tea. In fact, this double album may be no one's. The first record in particular is almost unlistenable. Unprofessional with a vengeance, Madcap is slovenly ineptitude pretending to be weird and far out. Its only value may be as an object lesson in the detrimental effects of too much dope."

Jeg kunne blive ved med at citere, men slutter med Bart Testas skudsmål af Donna Summers ’Love To Love You Baby’ fra 1975:

"Donna Summer's first album consists of the full sixteen-minute discoid moans and sighs of her hit title song and a few limp soul numbers. Interestingly, only "Love to Love You, Baby" is actually disco, serving as a novelty dance number. But it's too slow for dancing and too long for the recorded multiple orgasms not to become self-parodying."

God fornøjelse med læsningen. Det tog mig timer, før jeg kikkede op fra computerskærmen igen.

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